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Chief Wiggum Quotes

July 14, 2009


  1. Uh, no, you got the wrong number. This is 9-1… 2.
  2. Well let me ask you this: shut up.
  3. Sideshow Bob has no decency.  He called me Chief Piggum. (laughs) Oh wait, I get it, he’s all right.
  4. Can’t you people take the law into your own hands? I mean, we can’t be policing the entire city!
  5. How do you like that, it’s also illegal to put squirrels down your pants for the purpose of gambling.
  6. All right. Come out with your hands up, two cups of coffee, an auto freshener that says Capricorn, and something with coconut on it!
  7. She didn’t reckon with the awesome power of the Chief of Police. Now where did I put my badge? Hey, that duck’s got it.
  8. I hope this has taught you kids a lesson: kids never learn.
  9. This is Papa Bear. Put out an APB for a male suspect, driving a… car of some sort, heading in the direction of, uh, you know, that place that sells chili. Suspect is hatless. Repeat, hatless.
  10. Ooh, and here, out of the mists of history, the legendary esquilax, a horse with the head of a rabbit and the body of a rabbit.
One Comment leave one →
  1. Amrit permalink
    September 19, 2009 7:16 am

    Wiggum Rocks

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